Friday, November 22, 2013

Am I my Brothers Keeper?

When it comes to a family relationship, we need to constantly be striving to boost up our family and help them see their full potential in this life. Some may ask, "Am I my Brothers Keeper"? YES!!! You are the one that should help them to stay on the straight and narrow path and keep the commandments. God has given us the wonderful opportunity in the family to have checks and balances. If one person is having a rough time, or choosing the wrong path, then there are others in the family that care enough to help them realize their destructive course, and give them guidance to point them in the right direction. Some may decide that in some families that there are no morally strong people that reside in a family. While that is true in some cases, every family has at least one person that knows an increment of truth. That truth may have been borne to them through someone else's actions, or through trial and error on their own behalf. Even when people may think that they are being a hypocrite, it never hurts to tell another family member that if they are commencing in a plan of action that will incapacitate them spiritually or morally, then there will undoubtedly be consequences that will follow. Some people may say, well is there really a right direction in this life, and does it really matter? My answer is a resounding YES!! There is a correct direction to go and it makes all the difference in a families life in which path that person travels. If a member of the family chooses a path that leads to unhappiness, then they will most definitely reap unhappiness. The same is true in the opposite direction. My invitation to all is to always build and never destroy. Give liberally and never burn bridges. Love your family not desecrate them. In due time you will see that your family relationship will be joined more closely with happiness, and- in reality- unity will abound. Hopefully over the decades, each member of the family will realize that joy is real, and that it can be felt at home. It is one thing that doesn't have to come and go; it can stay forever.

Thursday, November 21, 2013

The Family: So Essential For Happiness

This weeks blog is going to be one that I wouldn't naturally do on a post like this, but I think that it is necessary. As I have been studying the scriptures, and have been taking classes on marriage and family I have been noticing a difference in my attitude towards my family. Suffice it to say that for the longest time I have had a bad attitude about how our family has been divided in spiritual matters, but so close in physical terms. I have always strived to put my family first and to love them with an unconditional love, but the spirituality in our family has been one thing that has held me back from accomplishing my desire. I have learned over time that no matter what our family circumstances are we need to love them no matter what they believe, or how they live their life. Our families are so important. If we want them to ever obtain the happiness and joy that God has established for all of his children, then we have to love them, and be a righteous example to them daily. The very way we live our lives is the very key to helping them come closer to established truth. When they see the example that is lived by their son, daughter/ brother, sister,  then they will begin to realize why changing is important and sooner or later gain the desire for themselves to change. I love my family so very much. I know they know I do, but I want them to be happy. I desire nothing more then for us to someday enter into the temple of our God and be sealed by the new and everlasting covenant of marriage for time and eternity. It is vital that if that desire is to be, then I need to be the example to them. My expressions need to be full of love and charity with an eye single to the glory of God. I need to serve them graciously and help them to realize their full potential. My family has every opportunity to be happy now and for eons to come. With all this being said, I desire for all that reads this blog to pick up your phone and call your mom and dad/ brother and sister and tell them of your love for them. I know that as you do this, you will begin to realize the very feelings that I have for my family, and you will then desire for them to come closer to God and do everything necessary to return to him someday.

Thursday, November 7, 2013

"Test Drive" vs. True Happiness

In our world people believe that living together is the way to go. The value of a test drive, to many, is the way to take a relationship “head on.” For several individuals, the feelings of pleasure and instant gratification are the grounds by which joy and happiness breed. To the general populous of the world, those feelings bring the same satisfactions that marriage does. Everyday people all over the world are trying to define the correct concept of what marriage is and why it is even important. Some agree that living together is a form of marriage and is perfectly fine because no matter how you obtain the individual companionship, in the end, everything will ultimately work out. Others judge that when it comes to obtaining a partnership, there is absolutely no need for a marriage because all it does is bind you down and yoke you to an obligation that might not even work out in the end. As quoted in an article titled “Cohabitation May Not Be Harmful to Parenting,” the author declares: “Just as so many of us have learned to make marriages work without the support of a religious community, we can probably manage partnerships without a wedding” (Sandler, 2013). Along those same lines, Solot and Miller came to an equal conclusion that “living together is a logical way to experience a relationship without making a lifelong commitment" (Solot, & Miller, 2006 p.78).  In recognizing those points of view, we can see that it makes sense that people would think that just because marriage is a possibility, does not mean that it is an obligation to make the promise. It is easier to just live with someone and not be committed to the relationship, be able to leave whenever you feel the need to, and also have the sexual intimacy at your own discretion. Even though those things may be true for some, the feelings of instant gratification will only last for a second and then heartache will prevail. Through research on this topic it has been found that living together is not a great idea after all. Many peoples’ perceptions of practicality have been skewed in relating back to real happiness. Morals are not something that surrender to public opinion, nor do they allow for man to judge what is right, or wrong in a society. Laws governing this earth are decreed on strict adherence to such morals. No matter what choice we make in this life, there will undoubtedly be a consequence that follows, either good or bad.  If commitment becomes weak among generations, or if sex is the only thing that is on peoples’ minds, then the nature of marriage will be desecrated and family unity will be on the brink of destruction.
Marriage in today’s society is a concept that is diminishing rapidly. The decay in society is nonetheless harmful, but unavoidably getting worse. In past research, we have come to a consensus that all the evidence that has been found dealing with living together points in the unanimous direction of unhappiness and the final result of personal ills that present themselves in the lives of those that condone the actions. In a study presented by a professor of sociology, Larry Bumpass, Ph.D., declared candidly that, “the generally accepted wisdom- that living together helps determine whether the relationship is meant to be- may be erroneous. In fact, numerous studies have shown the opposite to be true” (Stahl, 2006). He then went on to mention that, “divorce is higher- about 50 percent higher- among those who live together before marriage” (2006). 
In another article titled “Marriage should unite one man and one woman”, the author presents us with some very bold statistics when he says,
  An overwhelming body of social science data has established that America’s greatest social problems- violent crime, welfare dependency, and child poverty- track more closely with family disintegration than they do with any other social variable, including race and income level. (Alliance for Marriage 2006)
It is sad to note that peoples’ understandings of the way true happiness should spawn is not the way that it always does. The key to overcoming such pit falls in life is relying on the genuine concept of “work.” It has been proven that over hundreds of years, the lessons of life have given understanding to what we should do to have happy marriages. If we put to action our thoughts and work towards having a happy life, then we will notice the decisions and actions we will need to take to accomplish our goals. In the book titled Covenant Hearts, the author declares boldly a basic statement of life that, if applied, will bring a greater self-fulfillment to those searching for a companionship. He states,
Still while marriage is difficult, and discordant and frustrated marriages are common, yet real, lasting happiness is possible, and marriage can be more an exultant ecstasy than the human mind can conceive. This is within the reach of every couple, every person . . . if both are willing to pay the price. (Hafen, 2005)

So what is the price that needs to be payed? As declared by The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, in The Family: A Proclamation to the World we learn that, “successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities” (First Presidency, 1995 para. 7). The fundamental principles that we obtain as we follow these inspired words will cause within us great desires to become one with our companion, and life as we know it will tailor satisfaction as the end result. When the family comes into play, the important thing to remember is that if we are to have a successful family, then our marriage will need to be successful. If that is not the case, then the family is doomed to utter destruction.

Friday, November 1, 2013

Oppositions in a Relationship

What is life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness in a family relationship?
   
     When it comes to knowing that the family is the most important society on the face of the whole earth, we can know that it is God working in our units to build us up and strengthen our bonds. It is essential to realize that when it comes to the family and the importance of it in the whole eternal scheme of things, that righteousness in the home and prosperity in the family yields joy and peace in those persons lives. I have come to major understanding in my life that if we want happiness, then we are going to need to keep the commandments of God and overcome our natural tendencies. Every member of the family makes choices which either lead to happiness or despair. We need to realize that as we make those choices, a consequence comes that we can not determine. If it is a good choice then it builds and fortifies our relationship with those that are present in our lives, and if we choose to do something bad then we will ultimately perpetuate a bad example and the trust in our relationships will diminish. I love the concept of how positive actions yield true miracles. When we live our lives in accordance to Gods will and build our family up, then we can recognize that the constant changes for good are gratified and love will most definately compounded on itself. Individual choices are so essential to every happiness that we obtain in this life, and on the contrary if that person does not follow the guidance and council of God then there will be a lack of unity and joy in the vast relationship as a whole.
 
    Keep the Commandments of God! Trust in his power to build and fortify the family relationship!!
It works, I promise!!!